The top 3 things people find hardest about in-person dating events (...and what we're doing about it)

Nobody wants to admit they're nervous about going to a dating event. You'll tell your friends you're going "for a laugh," you'll spend hours picking an outfit that doesn't come across as you trying too hard... and then you'll spend the tube journey quietly negotiating with yourself about what counts as a legitimate reason to turn around.

This is normal. This is, in fact, almost universal. And it's something we've thought about a lot at Funnier Than Your Mum... because the whole point of what we do is that it shouldn't feel like that.

We've been running comedy dating events in London and Brighton long enough to have a pretty good idea of what scares people off. We also make a point of actually talking to our guests... sticking around after, asking how it went, listening to the bits that didn't land as well as the bits that did.

So here, honestly, are the things people find hardest about in-person dating events... and what we actually do about them.

1) "I don't know how to approach people... what do I even say?"

This is the big one. The fear that you'll end up standing opposite someone perfectly nice, brain completely empty, reduced to asking what part of London they live in and whether they have siblings, like a weird job interview.

The thing is, small talk isn't a personal failing. It's a design problem. If you put two strangers in a featureless room and tell them to get on with it, most people will struggle. Give them something... a shared experience, a reason to laugh, a prompt and the conversation starts itself.

here's our solution to that problem

When you arrive you'll get a conversation card. We know, we know... but hear us out. They're gamified and part of the whole night, not just something to fidget with while you wait for things to start. And the questions aren't the soul-destroying "describe yourself in three words" variety. They're actually interesting. The kind where someone thinks for a second before answering, and then before either of you has noticed, you've been talking for twenty minutes about something completely unexpected. The small talk problem has a solution. It turns out it was just a design problem all along.

2) "I won't know anyone and I'll feel like a spare part"

Walking into a room full of strangers at an in-person dating event is one of those things that sounds fine in theory and feels significantly less fine when you're actually doing it, on edge but trying to look like you're comfortable.

We've tried to remove as much of the awkward friction as possible, starting with the moment you walk in. Someone will show you to your seat.... which sounds minor until you've experienced the alternative, which is standing near the entrance holding a drink and trying to look like you meant to stand there. The tables have labels on them too. Not name cards. More like "sit here if you're a foodie" or "sit here if you never cook and have no intention of starting." Suddenly you're surrounded by people you already have something in common with, and the conversation has somewhere to go before it's even technically started.

here's our solution to THAT problem

London can be a lonely city in a way that's hard to explain to people who don't live here.... surrounded by millions of people and somehow still finding it difficult to meet anyone. The events we run are specifically designed to solve that, not just for people looking for a relationship but for anyone who wants a genuinely good night out with people they wouldn't otherwise have met.

3) "What if I'm just stood on my own all night"

Related to the above, but slightly different. This is less about the arrival and more about the middle bit... the fear that everyone else will somehow magnetically find their people and you'll be the one orbiting the edge of conversations, never quite breaking in.

This is why the group dynamic matters so much. Throughout the night we run team-based games... nothing that requires you to perform or put yourself on the spot, because that's not the point. It's always entirely up to you whether you volunteer or not. But the games create a reason to talk to people you haven't met yet, a shared thing to react to, a moment where someone across the table becomes a teammate rather than a stranger. Teams can earn points toward a big bar tab, which means the stakes are real enough to be fun without being so high that anyone feels pressure.

these people are having fun look at them

But... what if I have fun but don't actually meet anyone?

This is the one people feel slightly embarrassed to admit, because it sounds like admitting you came specifically to find someone. Which of course you did. That's fine. That's the whole point.

What's also true is that even if you don't meet someone you want to date, you might meet someone you want to be mates with. It happens more than you'd think. In-person dating events, when they're done well, are just rooms full of people who decided to say yes to something slightly outside their comfort zone on a weeknight. That's already quite a good filter.

We're not trying to make dating less weird. Dating is weird. It's awkward and chaotic and occasionally brilliant and we love leaning into the chaos.

People describe our nights as feeling like a chill house party more than a dating event. That's not an accident. It's the whole design.